In Laban's House

Genesis 27 tells the sordid story of deception and dishonesty. Rebecca wanted to make good on God's comment that the older would serve the younger. Taking things into her own hands, she coached Jacob in deceiving Isaac, his father and her husband. I wonder why she would do such a thing: did she closely identify with the underdog, as a woman in that society? Was it that important that she create a sibling hierarchy herself instead of waiting to see how God would arrange that to happen? Was she using her sons to get back at her husband for something? Did she feel so disenfranchised that she needed to use deception to get some control over what happened to her life? Why was Jacob so obviously closer to her than Essau? Was she afraid of what would happen to her if Essau received the greater inheritance and blessing from Isaac? Was Jacob such a milquetoast that he obeyed his mother against his will? That seems highly doubtful. But none of these questions are answered in the biblical account. We just notice that she and Jacob had a coalition against Isaac--a classic relational triangle--something that makes for trouble.

The long and short of it is that Rebecca and later, Isaac, sent Jacob off across the country to Uncle Laban's family until the wrath of Essau had worn off. Isaac thought of how he had obtained his own wife in that country, and Rebecca just wanted him to be safe. So off he went.

Remember, Laban was the one who had blessed Eleazer and then Rebecca, when he had seen them last. When Jacob was brought to his house, after kissing his cousin Rachel, and weeping aloud at the well, Laban welcomed him with open arms--his "own flesh and blood" (Genesis 29:14).

It appears that Jacob willingly went to work right away for Laban, helping him with his livestock and whatever pursuits Laban was involved in. I don't know if Laban didn't have a son of his own or not--the Bible doesn't list any--which is unusual in a society in which lineage is reckoned by males. Laban approached Jacob and invited him to name his price for his work on the farm. Jacob was in love with Rachel and asked for her as a wife. He offered to work seven years if he could just have her as a wife. Bear in mind that he had no money for a dowry, so his work took the place of gifts for the family.

When it was time to marry, Laban threw a huge wedding feast. In the evening, he slipped Leah into the tent with Jacob and that is the person with whom he consumated the marriage. I wonder what Rachel thought of all of this, or where she even was that night. Probably sobbing her heart out in some tent. Surely she could not have been duplicitous along with her father. But we don't know for sure what happened with her at that time.
And what of Leah? Was she a desperate single woman who had been waiting to get married but no one wanted her? Or was the only problem that she was a year or so older than Rachel and without marital prospects? I wonder, when Jacob was making love that night, if he was calling out Rachel's name. Why didn't she identify herself on that unfortunate wedding night? Did she have no choice in what happened to her? Was she in agreement with her father, or did it not matter? It was a morning after of shock and heartbreak. Jacob had just experienced a dream of a night with the woman he had been waiting to marry, only to find that he had been the butt of a very cruel turn of events.

He confronted Laban the next morning. "What is this you have done to me?" Didn't you say I am your own flesh and blood? Haven't I been faithful to you in all that I've done for you on this farm? How could you do this to me?"

Laban's answer: "It's not our custom here to give the younger daughter before the elder daughter. Finish the bridal week and then we will give you the younger one also--after another seven years of work." It occurs to me that in the seven years Jacob lived in that country, he would have learned of this custom himself. But it seems that he was completely shocked by his uncle's behavior. I wonder if he didn't fight back or leave because he realized that just seven years before that, he had been the one to pull the wool over the eyes of his father and brother. So he really deserved what he got.

I wonder why Laban felt he could get away with this. Did he not have any concern about giving a daughter in marriage who would not be loved--could not be loved? Apparently, this was not of concern to him. How did he feel he could justify asking Jacob to work another seven years--much less, present this business transaction the day Jacob was at his most vulnerable? Were elder males such that they had to be obeyed, regardless? In Laban's response to Jacob, there is no tenderness, no apology, no regret. Only a business proposal. There is no concern for Rachel, and certainly no regret for Leah's dismal marriage future. The very time when Leah should be enjoying the greatest affection and attention from her new husband, he was longing for her younger sister. It was a dismal business to be a woman in those days.

In seven days, Rachel became Jacob's wife. There is no mention that they had another wedding feast for her. I would have felt very left out and as though I were an add-on, had I been Rachel.

And life moved on as though nothing had happened--nothing is said about Laban. But he looks very unpleasant to me by this point, paternalistic society or not.