Endings and Beginnings

Today was graduation and all my students publicly moved ahead to their next step in life: new jobs, home and family, further study, vacations, finally time with children. It was such a privilege to see the students walk down the aisle and get their diplomas--these whose lives I've been part of for the last two years. Some of these students are the first in their family to go on for a graduate degree. They have sat in my office and with tears coming down their faces admit that they're terrified of getting an advanced degree because they think they have to act different or speak differently, or that their families will be embarrassed of them in some way. And how are they to prove to their families that they are just the same as they always were? But we know that even though their love for their families will never change, they do change as people. So we've had these conversations that helps to socialize students into a professional identity. Today when their parents saw them in their regalia something changed.

This student's came to the U.S. only four years ago, speaking no English whatever. He is one of the most intelligent and gifted students I've ever had. He is beloved by all of his classmates, his employers and his beautiful family. Today on Father's Day, he had them all come to see him pass this milestone. In the fall he will be in my doctoral classes. I am bursting with pride.

Some students come from families who don't have much faith that they will do more than be able to survive adulthood. When you see someone who has tremendous potential and they don't see it, there is nothing like seeing it register on their face that you have faith in them. For awhile they look at you askance because they're unsure your judgment can be trusted. As it dawns on them that you're serious and you know what you're talking about, something happens to them. Slowly they start paying more attention in class, ask more direct questions, and in general, seem to find their own voices. When they turn to look straight at you as they get their diploma, that knowing look speaks volumes.

This is the son of one of my doctoral students--I told her to look ahead 20 years and think of him in his doctoral regalia. We all start somewhere. She brightened and took a deep breath. It's a very long walk.